Overcoming self limiting thoughts

The power of thoughts has been well documented.  It is the basis of cognitive-behavior therapy.  The premise is that what you think, affects how you feel, which in turns affects how you behave. In my last post, I discussed how my negative thinking significantly impacted me.  I promised to show you how I overcame this self limiting habit.
The first step was to get a baseline for how often and the content of my negative thoughts.  I did this by journaling.  Every day, I spent fifteen minutes writing about my day, my dreams, frustrations and feelings.  What I discovered was that my most common refrain was--I CAN'T.  It flowed with  ease and no awareness,  from my mouth on the average, a whooping 8 times a day.  I can't run.  I can't garden. I can't paint.  The litany goes on and on.    STOP! I remember as a child my mother scolding me and telling me to stop saying those words.  What she didn't do was give me a replacement.  We often want children to change but we don't offer them an alternative way of behaving or thinking.  

Once I increased my awareness of this self limiting thinking, I was able to make changes.  It simply started with me replacing--"I can't" with, "I will try".  What I learned is that the things I once thought I couldn't do, I could, in fact, do.  For example, I have never attempted to run any distance-- ever.  I very quickly learned that not only could I run, I could run for a mile.  Soon I was able to run for two miles.   Now I didn't wake up and suddenly started sprinting.  I ran a block.  I slowed increased my distance and worked up to being able to sustain myself for greater distances.  I didn't change anything but my mind.  

I haven't completely broken the habit of the, "I can'ts".  It is a daily struggle but one in which I actively engage.  

I proactively participate in the process of changing my negative, self limiting thoughts.  As soon as I recognize a negative thought, I replace it with one that is more positive and self affirming.  It makes me feel better and more powerful.  That's much of what we want, right?

It's simple, isn't it?  Yes, it is but sometimes even the changes we know to be simple can be very challenging to change.  

Start by simply journaling.  Get an idea of the content and frequency of your negative, self limiting thinking.   

Start to challenge the negative thinking in the children whom you have contact with.  Don't forget to give them an alternative replacement for their negative thoughts.

Where do our negative thoughts come from?  Why do we have them?  I'll share that in my next post.